[Time Flies]

Holy-dissapearing-time-batman!!!

Seriously. It's been ages since I've written. I used to blog all the time when I was single....where'd the time go?

Does anyone even read this anymore? Or am I rambling on a white screen to nameless faces on the internet? Get ready for some stream of consciousness ;)

I can't believe Ethan is already 13 months, we're in our first ever own house, and we're settled in with Ben's job, etc. etc. It was fun to re-read what I had written many months ago.

God has seriously amazed me.

Is it bad that I'm sitting around kind of wondering what He expects from us now? Like....why has He blessed us with so much??
I try to not to think of it that way, because it's wrong to think that God would only give us things based on our actions....I just read a passage in Deut. that proves that thinking wrong. It's not like we've EVER done anything good to deserve anything in the first place.....whether big or small.

Anyway....I guess I'll just come out and say the times have been challenging lately, internet people.

I feel like this whole life transition of owning our own home, getting adjusted to Ben's never-ending work hours, etc., has brought us to a whole new stretching/learning point in our marriage.

I feel like we keep failing at this communication thing again!! Why can't we just get it right? I mean.....we've been married for 3 years....we should have some feeling of how things work,....right?
*Sigh*

I know.....many would disagree and say 3 years isn't long at all, and we'll be learning the rest of our lives...blah, blah, blah.....but in the mean time. Just, blah. I wish I could just figure out how/why the guy does what he does, ya know?

I wish I wasn't such a sensitive person! I'm learning more and more to give up and let things happen how they happen and not worry/want things how I imagine them to be. Things don't have to perfect. The house doesn't have to be spotless to be a good wife....I just need to keep learning. I'm sure God has a reason for all the things he keeps throwing at me lately. To teach me. To show me that He loves me. To teach me to trust Him. It's just that thing called sin nature that so often holds me back.
*sigh*

Still learning....


Anyway. Enough rough stuff.

I like writing, internet. Even if its not really to anyone, or if no soul ever reads this. It's just relaxing.


My kiddo is yelling at me from his room. Nap-time/mommy time is over.


Much Love,
*L